Life in Lockdown

At the time of writing this blog post, it’s been more than a month since the UK government announced a nationwide lockdown due to the coronavirus pandemic. Schools, pubs, restaurants, gyms, and “non-essential” businesses are closed, and we have been told to stay at home and only leave the house if we can’t avoid it, for example, to go food shopping.

I spotted this post on Sam's blog Griffblog. It’s part of a “link up” (or “linky”) where bloggers answer the same questions and link up their posts. The idea is to share your thoughts, feelings, and ideas on how to get through the coming weeks.

I thought it was a really good idea, and I’m sure in a few years I’ll find it interesting to read this post back and reflect on this strange time. Since I’ve missed the first few weeks I’m going to base my answers on the past 30 days rather than the past 7.

1) How are you feeling/coping?

Pretty well most of the time.  I'm quite sociable and like the freedom and independence to get the things I need, go for a long walk and so on.  However, I've not found being stuck in the house nearly as hard as I thought it would.  I've been having plenty of contact with people through social media, on the phone etc. and I'm not lonely at all - given that I have Mr Build-it and Miss Busy imprisoned with me and Mr Fix-it comes home from key-working every evening (via the shower).  The thing that frustrates me is knowing that the government scientists aren't actually sure about who really is "extremely vulnerable" (I'm on that list and have to stay in for at least 12 weeks) and who isn't.  I don't feel any more vulnerable than the next person and it frustrates me that I can't go and help my colleagues at work, or that more than likely I'm going to have to continue to work from home even when the schools reopen (I'm a primary school teacher).  Mr Fix-it is encouraging me to go out and get a walk (for some space aawy from the kids) but I don't feel I can.  It's not fair to my boss or colleagues if on one hand I'm telling them I have to stay home and "shield" and yet on the other hand am out for a jolly.  So I'm just keeping extremely busy and biding my time, hoping that as many of us as possible get through this in one piece.

2) What are you doing to keep yourself occupied?

I'm working from home as a Primary School Teacher.  This involves making sure we have prepared work for the children to access from home, communicating with families, and also ensuring that all possible paperwork to do with school is up-to-date!

I'm also a volunteer with the Scouts and we are continuing as much as possible with virtual Scouting, so I'm supporting adults with their training, supporting Cubs and Beavers by posting lots of activities they can do and logging it as they work through their badges.

I've been writing more.  Quite a lot more.  I've also obviously been supporting my children with their at-home learning (and just coping - they are finding this really hard), keeping fit and setting myself challenges, reading and catching up on housework and gardening.  

3) How are you dealing with everything at the moment – are you self-isolated, going out for essentials etc?

Because I'm on immune suppressants and have chronic kidney disease and high blood pressure (caused by a form of vasculitis) I'm in the governments “extremely vulnerable” category (people they believe could become seriously ill if they contract COVID-19). I'm not supposed to go out AT ALL.  So I'm not.  Mr Fix-it has been doing all the dog-walking, grocery shopping etc. in addition to going to work every day.  Don't tell him, but I think he's a bit of a hero.

4) What advice do you have for others?

I personally think the best way is to keep busy.  Being productive and useful makes you feel good.  Having said that, if you are feeling down and need to have a day off to lie on the sofa and feel sorry for yourself, that's absolutely okay too.  Miss Busy is eternally busy (hence the name) but Thursday afternoon and Friday she just wasn't feeling herself so I totally gave her licence to have a sofa day yesterday and not do her school work.  Today, she's back on form.

5) What have you bought this week that others might like? Especially if from a small business.

I haven't bought anything this week.  I'm trying to manage with as little buying as possible since I'm worried about all these busy delivery peeps.  If I do buy something I'm going to try to source it from an independent if possible rather than "globecorp" aka Amazon.

6) How has your routine been this week? (Question by Don’t Cramp My Style)

Fortunately, because Mr Fix-It is going to work every morning, I am getting up at a sensible 7am.  The children are up by 8am and we are all settled down to work by 9am at the latest.  I tend to work through most of the day, with Wednesday off, apart from a break for an hour for lunch and an hour's break at about 3 in the afternoon to do my exercise DVD.  I stop at about 5pm and do a bit of housework before cooking the dinner. 

7) Have you planned anything for once lockdown is over? (Question by Don’t Cramp My Style)

No.  Mainly because I don't know when that will be.  It's difficult to plan anything really with no end point in sight.  We've cancelled one holiday this Easter and will almost certainly not go on the planned holiday for the Summer (waiting until lockdown extension is confirmed so we don't have to pay cancellation fees on the ferry!).  We'd like to go exploring in Cornwall again, would like to take a trip to Applecross, though this may not be until next Spring.  I've also got two training courses to run this Autumn and would definitely like to get a Scout and Cub camp and at least a couple of Scout Group Activity days in the diary in the autumn... plus we'll definitely want to go and visit both sets of parents, and sisters and sister-in-law.  It's going to be a busy Autumn!

Thank you to Sarah (lifeinabreakdown.com) and Bex for coming up with this linky. If you’re a blogger and you’d like to answer these questions yourself then I’ll share them again below so you can copy + paste.

1) How are you feeling/coping?
2) What are you doing to keep yourself occupied?
3) How are you dealing with everything at the moment – are you self-isolated, going out for essentials, etc? Has this changed?
4) What advice do you have for others?
5) What have you bought this week that others might like? Especially if from a small business.
6) How has your routine been this week? (Question by Don’t Cramp My Style)
7) Have you planned anything for once lockdown is over in the past 7 days? (Question by Don’t Cramp My Style)
8) Anything else? 

Badge blankets - what are they and how do you make them?

I go by many names - but one that many young people know me by is Akela.
I've been involved in Scouts since I joined age 15 and have had all sorts of different volunteer roles.  For the last two years or so I've been a Cub Leader in Hereford.  Cub Leaders are known as Akela - like the chief wolf in the Jungle Book.

One thing that I've had that is a bit of a record of my Scouting journey is my badge blanket, sometimes called a camp or campfire blanket.  Since 1995 I have kept this blanket and gradually added to it.  I recently made a video explaining all about badge blankets.  In the video I didn't recount a funny story about how I started my blanket though:

We (the 5th Exmouth Venture Scouts) were going on a white water kayaking trip to the French Alps.  I had already cut my poncho shape and started my blanket stitching around the edge before heading off on the minibus.  By the time we got to the ferry at Portsmouth I had started stitching my lettering and walked up to the passenger area proudly sporting a blanket that said "Mel's Big"... hmmm.....  I continued sewing on the ferry but the result as I walked back down to the bus wasn't much improvement... "Mel's Big Blank"  I absolutely didn't care - I guess I have always been somewhat... individual.

Lockdown Targets

As lock-down here in the UK are extended by a further three weeks, I wonder what kind of lock-downer you are?  Are you a planner, with goals, targets and lists?  Are you a plate-spinner, trying to keep all those plates spinning but never sure where the next one will come from?  Or are you a drifter, not worrying too much and taking each day as it comes?

I don't think anybody who knows me will be surprised to find that I'm a planner.  I have a very love-hate relationship with lists.  There have been times when my lists have got out of control - if there's too much on there and I don't feel I'm getting things done it can make me feel anxious and despondent.  On the other end, if I see that I am making good progress through my lists then I can feel very good about myself.  I have tried to live without lists (I always ditch them when I'm away on holiday) but I can't keep it up for long.  I always end up wondering what I'm missing, what I'm forgetting to do... and I start writing things down so I don't forget... and before you know it I've got a list again.

So of course I have a plan for lock-down.  I would hate to come out feeling that I've wasted the potential of these twelve weeks.  Of course, as I've posted previously, I'm putting my own and my family's happiness as top priority.  I am also still being paid my (part time) salary to work from home.  That doesn't mean I can't have other targets too.  I won't go into detail here but here are some headlines.  I'd love to know what your aims are while you are at home.

• school work
• reviewing MFL provision at school
• supporting and planning for my Beavers and Cubs.
• planning adult training for Hereford and Worcester for Autumn and 2021
• supporting the training, validation and compliance of adult volunteers in the County.
• creative writing
• build up freelance writing
• tame garden
• finish decorating a few rooms in the house that have been started
• come out a few kg lighter and a lot fitter
• catch up with some of my craft projects

How not to win at Monopoly - one of the mysteries of parenting

"Will you play Monopoly with us Mummy?"
"Yep, give me a minute and I'll be there,"  I was thinking this would be some good quality family time.  Only now, four hours later, with two of the family in tears and the other feeling very guilty, do I remember that Monopoly is the other name for the God of Family Strife.

Image from wikipedia

The problem is that I like Monopoly.  I have a good strategy.  And I won.

Both children finished in their bedrooms upset.  Hubby suggested that maybe I should start letting them win - not sure how to be honest, maybe next time I don't buy any houses?  So now they are sad (though both determined to win next time) and I feel guilty.

Why do we buy this game?  Surely it rates higher than washing up and Christmas on the list of things that cause family rows...

What's your board game of choice?

Creative makes - a child's art case

I thought I'd share my latest make.  It was my littlest nephew's 5th birthday yesterday.  I had already bought him a couple of bits but wanted to make him a little something too.  I don't see him all that often (and when I do he rarely speaks to me), so I asked my sister what he's into at the moment.  The answer came back: Star Wars and the Avengers, games and puzzles, and books.

The first thing I did was search for some Avenger fabric.

Once that arrived, I decided what to make, found some plain fabric to pair with the Avengers, and made myself a pattern.

Then I got stitching.  I did it in two halves so that when carried, the Avengers stay the right way up on both sides.  First I hemmed the pockets, then stitched them onto the plain fabric.  Next, I sewed the edges of both fabrics together on three sides, inside out.  I then turned them the correct way and top-stitched.

The next step was to cut some cardboard to size for the inside.  This is to make the case firm, so he can lean on it when out and about.  I used a pizza box from the recycling.

Finally, I made a handle and then stitched it in place as I sewed the two halves together.  This was the trickiest part as there wasn't much leeway on the fabric around the cardboard and I also wanted to do it neatly, without leaving any raw edges.  I then slotted in some paper, pencils and the notepad I had already bought, made a birthday card to go with it and popped it in a parcel ready to post.

P.S.  Sadly, I don't think popping a parcel to the post-office counts as an "essential journey" so I haven't yet dispatched the children to the post office for me.  The parcel is still sitting on my desk and waiting for the Covid storm to break before it goes in the mail.  On the positive side, this means that littlest nephew will get an extended birthday as the gifts will be rolling in at some point through the Spring and Summer! 

Why it's okay NOT to do Joe Wicks

No offence meant to Joe Wicks here.  I've done a couple of his workouts and the man is a legend.  The internet is bursting at the seams with activities that you can plug into or do at home at the moment.  There is so much choice out there.  The issue is that so many of us are trying to work from home and educate from home as well as just existing.  All these activities are a good source of inspiration for parents who are used to out-sourcing their children - gym classes, Cubs, swimming lessons, boxing and so on.  However, it does leave you with a vague sense that if you aren't doing Joe Wicks every morning, followed by online art lessons, online Steve Backshall, online Scout activities and online education, as well as downloading all the free resources being offered by the BBC, Twinkl and every other portal on the interweb, then you are somehow failing your children.

I'm here to tell you that this is not so.  

What is important is maintaining sanity and love within your family.  

In a time full of financial and health anxiety, in a time when people are concerned about their jobs and their family and friends, in a time when we are facing an unprecedented global pandemic, that's when we are all confined to our homes and cut off from friends and from the outdoors.  A walk alone in the woods is my choice of activity to re-balance and to restore my sense of self and optimism.  We normally have a healthy mix of society and solitude in our lives.  Time to think and time to talk.  At the moment we have some people forced into solitude, while others are denied it.  It's hard for our children too: used to the routine and society of school, time and space to run and jump, laugh hysterically at the daftest things, feel proud of themselves when they get the right answer or seek solace with friends if they don't.  Now they're stuck at home with only a limited understanding of why. 

I'll be honest.  I'm finding this hard.  I'm supposed to be self-isolated for another ten weeks.  I want to do a good job for the families I'm supporting as a teacher and as a Scout volunteer; I want to get the house and garden looking good; I want to build up my writing again; I want to get fit... all during this period of isolation.  What I'm learning though, is that looking after myself and my family is going to have to take priority here.  In the last few days I've had a deep sense of anxiety, unease and disquiet.  I have been irritable and tearful.  Miss Busy, who is very nine: noisy, messy and emotional, is finding the lock-down overwhelming and needing her mummy.  My husband, when he gets home from a busy and tense day as a hospital doctor, needs a lot of support too - for him, planning for the future helps him deal with the present.  

So I'm remembering that I need to prioritise cuddling with a film over replying to e-mails;  Playing a board game with the children over cleaning the floor;  While my to-do list doesn't get any shorter, reaffirming connections within the family, building our strength in this time of uncertainty, seems the more important task.  When this is over, like the flowers that grow back more vigorously after they've been cut back, we will be ready to bloom vibrantly.  When we look back, we'll think of 2020 as the year that made us.

So don't feel that you have to be busy all the time.  Don't feel that you need to keep up with all the activities and resources.  Don't worry about fancy-schmancy specially-created internet resources and lessons.

Do your best to keep up with the things that you have to do for your work and your children's education (don't worry too much about this - they are remarkable at learning when nobody is teaching them, and will also soon fill in the gaps when they get back to school).  Mostly though, it's okay to do the simple things, to spend time just being, and just connecting with your children.

Here are a few things you can do as a family: 

1) play with the kids - get the Lego or the doll house out and get down there and play with the children.

2) Do the housework together.  This one may be a harder sell for older kids, but I taught Mr Build-it to iron shirts yesterday (we had to submit a video for his Scout Skills Challenge), you're teaching them valuable life skills, and its definitely more fun when you do it together - and that's a life-lesson in itself.

3) Play silly games like charades and hide-and-seek.  A daft friend posted a video of herself playing noughts-and-crosses with her dog.  (ask and I'll tell you how - very amusing!)

5) Rediscover peaceful crafts that you can just sit and do together - drawing, painting, rock painting, crochet, knitting and sewing.  Or if those don't appeal - how about wood-work or creating miniature models for Warhammer or a model railway.  These things take time and lets face it, we're not going anywhere in a hurry, and you get the satisfaction of creating something.

6) Bake and cook together.  Explore those cook books and come up with some recipes that you can make.  (Forward planning is useful here as given the shopping limitations for most of us at the moment.)

Most of all, try to relax.  Don't try to do too much.  Press the "Reset System" button on your life.

If grannies wore knickers...

If Grannies wore knickers, would they look like these?

Just an opportunity to show off my latest craft project really.

Several years ago my amazing big sister sent me a link to this pattern http://www.sfmgs.co.uk/2016/09/granny-square-crochet-shorts-free-pattern.html, and suggested that I might make her some at some point.  (She blogs at http://www.seasidebelle.com/)

It takes me a while.  I got around to it eventually.  My other crochet project has reached a fiddly hiatus and needs some concerted effort to continue, so granny squares seemed like a great idea.  I dutifully followed the pattern given on the link above.  In fact, I was pretty excited and thought I'd almost finished.  Then I tried them on.  There is something wrong with the pattern.  By following the pattern you get just the bottom half of the shorts shown above.  To call them hipsters is being very ungenerous to hipsters.  I know I have a largish bottom, but these didn't even come halfway up the cheeks!  So I made another four squares and built an extension!

 I tried them on for size and was suitably happy.  My sister's bottom is considerably smaller than mine, so if they could stretch around me, they would be fine for her.  I don't often wear holey clothing, I'll be honest, but mum assured me that "if anyone could carry off an item of clothing like that, Jo can."  It's true - photos on her Facebook include her dressed as: Betty Boop, the fairy on the Christmas Tree, a Greek goddess and Scary Spice.  However, apparently her child #3 has put his foot down and suggested that she needs to line them as it's not right for her to wear shorts where people can see her pants!  

I feel reasonably sure that she will defy him and that these shorts will get at least one outing, and that she will carry them off with style nothing like a granny!