No offence meant to Joe Wicks here. I've done a couple of his workouts and the man is a legend. The internet is bursting at the seams with activities that you can plug into or do at home at the moment. There is so much choice out there. The issue is that so many of us are trying to work from home and educate from home as well as just existing. All these activities are a good source of inspiration for parents who are used to out-sourcing their children - gym classes, Cubs, swimming lessons, boxing and so on. However, it does leave you with a vague sense that if you aren't doing Joe Wicks every morning, followed by online art lessons, online Steve Backshall, online Scout activities and online education, as well as downloading all the free resources being offered by the BBC, Twinkl and every other portal on the interweb, then you are somehow failing your children.
I'm here to tell you that this is not so.
What is important is maintaining sanity and love within your family.
In a time full of financial and health anxiety, in a time when people are concerned about their jobs and their family and friends, in a time when we are facing an unprecedented global pandemic, that's when we are all confined to our homes and cut off from friends and from the outdoors. A walk alone in the woods is my choice of activity to re-balance and to restore my sense of self and optimism. We normally have a healthy mix of society and solitude in our lives. Time to think and time to talk. At the moment we have some people forced into solitude, while others are denied it. It's hard for our children too: used to the routine and society of school, time and space to run and jump, laugh hysterically at the daftest things, feel proud of themselves when they get the right answer or seek solace with friends if they don't. Now they're stuck at home with only a limited understanding of why.
I'll be honest. I'm finding this hard. I'm supposed to be self-isolated for another ten weeks. I want to do a good job for the families I'm supporting as a teacher and as a Scout volunteer; I want to get the house and garden looking good; I want to build up my writing again; I want to get fit... all during this period of isolation. What I'm learning though, is that looking after myself and my family is going to have to take priority here. In the last few days I've had a deep sense of anxiety, unease and disquiet. I have been irritable and tearful. Miss Busy, who is very nine: noisy, messy and emotional, is finding the lock-down overwhelming and needing her mummy. My husband, when he gets home from a busy and tense day as a hospital doctor, needs a lot of support too - for him, planning for the future helps him deal with the present.
So I'm remembering that I need to prioritise cuddling with a film over replying to e-mails; Playing a board game with the children over cleaning the floor; While my to-do list doesn't get any shorter, reaffirming connections within the family, building our strength in this time of uncertainty, seems the more important task. When this is over, like the flowers that grow back more vigorously after they've been cut back, we will be ready to bloom vibrantly. When we look back, we'll think of 2020 as the year that made us.
So don't feel that you have to be busy all the time. Don't feel that you need to keep up with all the activities and resources. Don't worry about fancy-schmancy specially-created internet resources and lessons.
Do your best to keep up with the things that you have to do for your work and your children's education (don't worry too much about this - they are remarkable at learning when nobody is teaching them, and will also soon fill in the gaps when they get back to school). Mostly though, it's okay to do the simple things, to spend time just being, and just connecting with your children.
Here are a few things you can do as a family:
2) Do the housework together. This one may be a harder sell for older kids, but I taught Mr Build-it to iron shirts yesterday (we had to submit a video for his Scout Skills Challenge), you're teaching them valuable life skills, and its definitely more fun when you do it together - and that's a life-lesson in itself.
3) Play silly games like charades and hide-and-seek. A daft friend posted a video of herself playing noughts-and-crosses with her dog. (ask and I'll tell you how - very amusing!)
5) Rediscover peaceful crafts that you can just sit and do together - drawing, painting, rock painting, crochet, knitting and sewing. Or if those don't appeal - how about wood-work or creating miniature models for Warhammer or a model railway. These things take time and lets face it, we're not going anywhere in a hurry, and you get the satisfaction of creating something.
6) Bake and cook together. Explore those cook books and come up with some recipes that you can make. (Forward planning is useful here as given the shopping limitations for most of us at the moment.)
Most of all, try to relax. Don't try to do too much. Press the "Reset System" button on your life.
